those days are over now.

assalamualaikum.

Everyday I feel the same, 
Stuck, and I can never change
Sucked into a black balloon, 
Spat into an empty room
Was it really worth it?
Did I really deserve it?
It happens when you're hurting
It taught me out the surface
Of my heart

I'm living dead 
Only alive
When I pretend
That I have died 
I haven't lived life
I haven't lived love
Just bird's eye view
From the sky above
I'm dead dead dead dead
I'm living dead dead dead dead
Dead
Got bubble wrap around my heart
Waiting for my life to start
But everyday it never comes
Permanently at square one
When it's late at night
I'm so dissatisfied
In the wait for a empty life
We hassle in the moonlight
In the light
In the light
I'm living dead dead dead dead
Only alive
When I pretend
That I have died 
I haven't lived life
I haven't lived love
Just bird's eye view
From the sky above
I'm dead 
I'm living dead 
Dead
Lying back in a glittery mist and I
I think of all the man that
I could have kissed
I haven't lived my life
My thoughts of you from
From up above
I'm living dead 
Only alive
When I pretend
That I have died 
I haven't lived life
I haven't lived love
Just bird's eye view
From the sky above
I'm dead 
I'm living dead 
Dead.

Marina and The Diamonds-Living Dead

subhanallah.i need some space to think in a proper way.